1 week Post Show...

One week has passed since my show...ugh!! Talk about roller coaster ride! The show itself was very long, exciting! Overall ,I had a really great time ,especially with all my friends backstage.  It's funny how one minute your on top of the world and the next you find yourself wiping out and landing at the bottom. For me that's exactly what has happened. Needless to say, I didn't place and I've always said at the end of the day it never mattered about where I placed and this still holds true- yet this time, I found myself disappointed?? Why was it different this time? Was it because this time I really thought in my heart I would've done better than coming in dead last in my category???? Ugh!!! Did I choose the wrong category? Was my posing not up to par? Was I not proportioned enough? These are all questions that filled my mind this entire week. I had promised myself I wouldn't get myself into a funk post show, like I had for all my previous shows. This has been a long, emotional and exhausting week, to say the very least. So, now I'm feeling like now what? Deep down I really want to figure this all out so bad. Why am I struggling with this? I'm sure we all feel this way from time to time?

Guess I'm still learning and will I ever stop? No, I never want to stop learning...I need to learn how to improve, how to maintain, and how to move on from disappointment. So it's back to the drawing boards for me. Time to pick up the broken pieces and put that puzzle back together again until I can do it with my eyes closed. Throughout all this I've learned and realized that this isn't something I can just quit or put on the back burner. I've got to pull myself out of that funk and figure it out. For me, my break is over. Back to working on improvement. I've only got a month and half before the kids are out of school. YIKES!!! I can do this!!! I need to do this!!!

Now onto the positive. At this show, I was so incredibly proud of my friends. They all looked gorgeous and some of them had placed. We all had our ups and downs for sure, yet being together in that dressing room- it was all about celebrating our own journeys that had got us there! I made my clean treats to share. It was like we were one big family down there. Helping each other out and cheering each other on. That experience is what keeps me in the game. Way to go GIRLS! Lets keep each other strong!

and so I'm going to try harder! It won't be easy but it will be worth it... Congrats again to all my friends and to all the competitors I competed with. See you at the next show.